Chappell Roan parenting comments: Mum Amy reacts and reveals one thing she’s missed with her assumptions | Opinion

OPINION — I think everyone has some misconceptions about how parenthood is going to go before it happens to you. 

It might be delulu ideas of all beige toys, no screentime ever and, of course, having a baby that’ll just slot right into your schedule. 

Now, singer Chappell Roan has made some controversial comments about people who have kids during an episode of Alex Cooper’s Call Her Daddy podcast, and they fit into that same category of assumptions. 

To put it bluntly, everyone she knows with kids is miserable with their life right now. 

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“All my friends who have kids are in hell,” the Pink Pony Club singer told Cooper.

“I actually don’t know anyone who’s happy and has children at this age.

“I literally have not met anyone who’s happy anymore, who has the light in their eyes, anyone who has slept.” 

Now, she’s not wrong about some of this – there have been nights where I’ve had a total of two hours sleep and I am miserable. But it doesn’t make me resent or regret the fact that I’m a mum. 

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What’s missing from this conversation the acknowledgment that two feelings can co-exist at the same time. 

You can be burnt out and touched out by your kids for sure, and I’m sure plenty of Roan’s good friends who are parents have vented to her on these days. 

But it doesn’t take away from loving your kids and enjoying being a mum – or dad.

You can be so frustrated after trying to wrangle a toddler into their car seat and still be grateful you get to spend the day with them. The two feelings of being so over parenting but also being so in love with your kids can happen at the same time. 

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My best friend, who doesn’t have kids, has been on the other end of my venting on a horrible day of being subjected to toddler tantrums, and that’s because she’s a safe place for me to open up about that bad stuff. 

But she’s also the person who gets the videos of my daughter finally referring to her as her ‘aunty’ or riding her trike properly for the first time, and sharing all of the joys with me too. 

Maybe the difference here is Roan is 27, and a pretty hot pop star right now, living the life and not at a place where settling down is right for her – and that’s fine.

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Roan is not wrong with some of her comments, either. Hell, anyone (parents or not) running on next to no sleep is going to be miserable – no one is going to disagree with that. 

But turning on the singer for the comments is also wrong, because you also can’t understand both sides of what she’s saying until you’ve lived in both lives. 

From the outside looking in, it might seem like your friends are in “hell”. 

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A groundhog day of changing nappies, negotiating with toddlers to do the most basic tasks like get dressed or eat a mouthful of food, being overstimulated and touched out while struggling to juggle everything – yeah, it’s a lot.

What you don’t see is the fun, the laughter as your kid cracks a joke or says something so adorably funny without meaning to, the sleepy cuddles as you read them a book or the first time they say “I love you”.

They’re the bits that make the hellish days more bearable, and the ones all parents look back on. 

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