Do It For Dolly Day: Kate Everett spends every day ensuring no child feels alone, seven years after losing her daughter Dolly

Losing her daughter to suicide was like an earthquake for Kate Everett, one that was felt across the country.

Today, on Do It For Dolly Day, Kate is reflecting on life without her youngest child. She tells 9honey every day is hard, and many moments trigger thoughts of her unfathomable loss.

“Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, birthdays, school days… smells and songs and moments that catch you by surprise,” she says.

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“I think it’s days like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day that probably exacerbate those feelings a little bit. But it’s also a good reminder to continue doing what we’re doing.”

Dolly was just 14 years old and had been subjected to relentless bullying before she took her own life on January 3, 2018.

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Images of the teenager on the family’s country property, smiling from under a wide-brimmed hat, were beamed around Australia and then the world in 2018.

A recent survey by Kids Helpline, which works closely with Dolly’s Dream and runs their helpline, has found that bullying remains a major issue for young Australians.

One young person said: “I really think we should talk about verbal bullying a LOT more because it’s not just teasing or joking, it impacts the person, and in my classmate’s case, their image of themselves.

“So please make sure to teach kids even from a young age that teasing or joking about someone’s looks (and teasing and joking about other things) is wrong and can actually really hurt that person, whether you think you’d be offended or not (people are different).”

Another said: “I didn’t feel comfortable talking with adults about my mental health. I also didn’t want to reach out for support with bullying as I was threatened that if I told someone…”

A third wrote: “Focusing on social media bans is not as important as cyberbullying and bullying, which is done on messages, forums, and in person.

“Inclusion is a main part of Australia, as we have many people of different cultures and backgrounds.”

Devastated by the loss of their daughter, Kate her husband Tick, and their older daughter Meg launched Dolly’s Dream in memory of the teenager.

The organisation has worked tirelessly to address the scourge of bullying, which not only takes place in schools but also follows victims home via digital devices, via helplines, school workshops, and resources.

Kate and Tick celebrate their 24th wedding anniversary this month, and Kate knows how lucky they are to have each other.

“I count my blessings when I can, you know?” she says. “I look across the table and I know I’ve got a strong partner in what we do in our charity, but in life itself and as a parent.”

The couple have been doing the media rounds together for Do It For Dolly Day, in the hope of continuing to raise awareness of the cause.

“We’ve launched on TikTok recently,” she says, adding that their “organic growth and viewing is phenomenal”.

“It’s one of those things where I think we’ve focused on trying to add positive messaging around a difficult conversations.”

“I count my blessings when I can, you know?”

They understand the importance of their work, receiving messages from grateful parents as well as “heartbreaking ones”.

As time passes, Kate says the tone is less “urgent” and more about building “momentum”.

“We just keep doing what we do. And we’ve got an incredible team that is supporting us. So, yeah, here we are again.”

The original messaging for Do It For Dolly Day remains. Wear blue to end bullying.

“So it couldn’t be any simpler,” she says. “Then seeing this come together across especially rural communities… it was beautiful to see small rural communities getting together and making an effort.”

Kate still feels overwhelmed when looking at those early news clips about her daughter for media coverage of Do It For Dolly Day.

“In an instant, I’m back to that day,” she says.

She sees friends of Dolly’s who are still finishing school, donning blue for the cause.

“How absolutely brilliant that she touched the lives of those kids that would have been much, much younger than her at the time,” she reflects.

Many of the enquiries Dolly’s Dream receives are from parents needing support for their children.

“Parents have been quite open and talking about bullying and using Dolly and her name as a segue into a conversation,” she says, with many asking for advice on how to have harmful content about their children removed from online forums.

Kate says it’s important for parents to stay engaged with their children as well as the technology they are using.

“It’s not like it was for us when we first got a mobile phone and we could send a text message. It’s very consuming,” she says. “And so having parents engaged is vital as well.”

If you or someone you know is in need of support, contact Dolly’s Dream on 0488 881 033 or Kid’s Helpline on 1800 55 1800.

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