Eliza Paschke of The Block on the hateful comments from trolls and the toll of life in the public eye

Recently on my podcast Try Before You Die, I opened up about being the victim of a sexual and physical assault in 2019.

The response wasn’t entirely what I expected. While inundated with support, I was also the target of several hateful comments.

I publicly shared the darkest, most harrowing moment of my life in the hope it might help others.

Weeks of preparation and consideration were required to ensure the issue of violence against women was discussed factually and sensitively.

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I was extraordinarily proud of the episode we delivered.

I’ll never understand how anyone can think it’s acceptable to write “no conviction, no crime” and “I call BS”, on a Facebook post about how I’m utilising my deepest trauma to try and make the world a safer place.

What possesses an individual to deliberately incite anguish like this?

Trolling involves posting malicious remarks on social media platforms with the intent to provoke, offend or humiliate.

Trolls often use fake names so they can escalate their brazenness and avoid being held responsible.

We know them as faceless keyboard warriors – vile humans online, who would never say anything to you in person.

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According to Evita March, Associate Professor of Psychology at Federation University Australia, studies show trolls have low levels of empathy, guilt and accountability.

Their motivation can range from somewhat harmless to overtly sadistic, driven by sadness, anger, jealousy, or a simple desire to be mean.

This behaviour can have a serious impact on its recipients, including lowered self- esteem, depression, and in some cases suicide.

Sadly, deaths linked to trolling are all too familiar. TV presenter and prominent anti- cyberbullying campaigner Charlotte Dawson tragically took her own life in 2014 after years of relentless harassment.

The suicide of former Love Island UK host Caroline Flack also prompted further calls for changes to social media and press regulation.

Before my sister Liberty and I went on The Block as contestants, we’d speculate how easy and carefree the life of an influencer would be.

A role with flexibility, fame, freebies and fun sounds like a dream! Having experienced a tiny taste of that realm, we now realise this power comes with extreme public scrutiny.

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A few weeks ago we presented what we felt was a well-researched, authentic and fair conversation about Meghan and Harry on our podcast.

However, what ensued was quite severe backlash on a scale that was incredibly foreign to us. Ironically, those labelling us nasty bullies were the most cruel and aggressive.

This has undoubtedly resulted in us being hesitant to share our opinions moving forward.

Thankfully, the insults we cop are minor in comparison to what larger-profile commentators endure.

Divisive topics will naturally fuel heated debates, but the more controversial the subject matter, the more poisonous the feedback.

We can’t fathom the vitriol an outspoken personality like Abbie Chatfield receives. She’s often candid about the immense toll online trolling takes on her mental health, to the point of suicide ideation.

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Rachael Finch is another public figure who is no stranger to criticism, having not long ago discovered an anonymous email viciously attacking her looks, business and parenting.

This is way beyond what anyone should be required to tolerate.

Even lovable larrikin Ed Sheeran quit Twitter at one point, citing overwhelming abuse from trolls.

Alarmingly, one in three internet users have been trolled (The Australia Institute has found), with one in five young Australians (aged 8 to 17) reporting being socially excluded, threatened or abused online (according to the national eSafety Commissioner).

As a mental health advocate (speaking in schools, universities and workplaces), I’m witnessing first-hand the increased prevalence of cyberbullying.

The eradication of this widespread problem is unlikely, but reducing the power of trolls is possible.

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Attempts at reasoning will only trigger the haters, but killing them with kindness and humour is an effective method we use to disarm and silence.

Ignoring, blocking and reporting is also a reliable solution if all else fails!

When you’re in the public eye by choice, you are knowingly exposing yourself to judgement.

But signing up to a reality show doesn’t mean you consent to being a full- time punching bag.

When you next have the urge to criticise, perhaps ask yourself how you’d feel if those words were aimed at your parent, sibling or child.

Support is available from the National Sexual Assault, Domestic Family Violence Counselling Service at 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732).

If you or someone you know is in need of mental health support contact Lifeline on 13 11 14, Men’s Helpline on 1300 78 99 78. In the event of an emergency contact Triple Zero (000).

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